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By J.D. Houvener
Patent Attorney and Founder

good afternoon everybody Welcome to The Bold and better show I’m your host JD Hoover and I’m here with my trustee always ready to rock and roll Matt kohlseth co-host oh hello hello hello you’re looking quite sharp today did you have a court appearance or something my friend yeah a couple traffic

no joke no um okay okay so yeah I came home from my my trip and I haven’t had a chance to like do all of the laundry and so now I’m you know digging off the clothes that actually you know look like a turning clothes smells absolutely my goodness we’re all right you’re looking quite sharp we’ll have to maybe make your image larger uh from time to time for those on the podcast there we go yeah looking sharp so um okay we’re kicking this thing off we’re starting out weird we’re talking weird it’s getting funny and weird that’s the topic weird patterns funny pens and I kind of you know tongue-in-cheek was thinking about thousand you know what that is rude because the truth is all inventors are weird right they’re coming up with strange things and they have found a way obviously if they’ve got it patented to be the first of the first human in the whole world to come up with something and bring it to the world and what we’re going to talk about today and we have a repeat theme is that okay patent ability is one thing but having success right making money is another and you do need marketability and so I’m going to show my patent success Matrix uh which is uh Matthew probably saying that before where we’re going to kind of talk about some of the things and why you need to be concerned about both okay um but we’re gonna have some good laughs and have some fun I’ve got seven examples to jump into Matt did you have anything on your mind before we get right to these no I’m uh I’m excited my my wife I didn’t tell you this JD my wife is in Paris right now she took uh a solo trip to Paris whoa as payback for me going down to Montana she decided you know I’m gonna I’m Gonna Leave You with the kids for a week I’m um wild I’m getting images from her just all around Paris eating croissants and stuff that sounds so good I love Paris I went with my wife in 2014 before we had kids and had a blast we spent six days there and it was awesome it was just chill it was awesome we walked around everywhere it was awesome well hopefully she’s having a good trip yep um and enjoying that so let’s see here we are attorneys and so before we jump into these screen share I’ll be looking at some patents and end their word hopefully you’ll get you know a little bit of excitement and kind of lower that you know frenetic energy sometimes inventors get caught up oh I’ve got to have the most technological the most amazing you know earth-shattering invention and this is gonna hope no you what you want to find is the Chia Pet I mean that’s what we’re looking for I was thinking about it Matt do you need the um the bread tie the the bread tie the piece of plastic that’s going to be in every single person’s house um it’s just that that thing the guitar pick I don’t know little things you don’t need to be uh you know Einstein okay classic reference you need to take them up something new so these will be um hopefully you know a nice little wind in your sails Mr Mrs inventor um if you have questions I do encourage you to ask um but the answer is you know hey money back guarantee as Matt says with respect to our our you know quality assurance uh we’re gonna do our best we are not your attorneys as I’m sure you are aware but if you’re not this is not a confidential Forum this is a public live broadcast so please do not ask or share your confidential invention information if you do have something to share I will provide a link later today where you can book a free Discovery call with our good buddy Dallas who is our intake and client success manager the best he’s a bomb he’s a bomb don’t forget trademarks it’s not just about patents here maybe we can do a weird trademarks day um have you compile you know something yeah I would love to do a weird trademarks day okay good isn’t that every day okay

let’s just get right to it my friend all right we’re sharing my screen I’m going to share the whole thing oh no I’m not that would be pretty good me in trouble so this as advertised I want to show really ah what do I do I want to show this one this was on the cover

drum roll

pantyhose garment with spare leg portion huh all right all right one of the drawings first we did this for football and this is so good when I first saw this I thought oh my gosh are two people getting in the same pantyhose but then there’s only three and then things started getting x-rated in my mind and then no no no this was brought actually to our Li our whole Law Firm team meeting for a couple Chuckles but it was explaining that this is a for the most part women’s pantyhose okay okay the concept is if you get a run in the leg you’re familiar with that right oh yeah yeah I mean whenever whenever I wear pantyhose so you simply dashed into the restroom tuck in and wrap around your waist the one that is has the run in it and stick your leg down the new one okay okay practical you have to carry a bit of extra fabric um but they had to get around some prior art I mean you can see this is going to be bulky I mean you’re not going to be wearing anything skin tight and get away with that um you see the the crotch absorbent pads so as we get down toward the bottom they had to limit the claims my goodness uh said panty member constructed by stitching pantyway sections oh here excuse me claim number one uh we’re talking about a panda is gone with a spreading portion comprising a panty member having three absorbent crotch members my gosh when two is not enough when two

I think it’s perfectly said moving along you know 1998 and so you know what’s good news for you Matt being a pantyhose worker um this is now completely open to the public this is past its 20 expiration anyone can go and make uh a three-legged pantyhose yes you can make yourself completely exploit this technology yeah um and it’s actually no maybe less less known um so I I’m hopeful that Annette Papa’s was able to make some money out of that um I mean I will say it’s it’s got some practicality I bet yep yeah and you know I was saying there’s a lot of prior art and the fact is I’m wrong on that I mean the examiner’s job is to find anything that’s even remotely close and they only came up with okay five references and one foreign time document it tells me this thing is unique okay let’s go to the next one as advertised again let’s do it we’re rocking and rolling keep an eye on the are you able to see the questions come in if we have any um yeah I should be able to okay keep an eye on that this is this was on the front cover as well okay you’re a pet owner here uh yeah um what is this is this to keep water out of dog’s ears when they get wet oh that’s all you know let’s take a look actually uh protecting the ears especially long-haired dogs from becoming soiled by the animal’s food while animals eating okay so if you got a pig dog and this device uh looks like it keeps the dog’s ears pinned back so they can’t get their food in their ears yep it is weird it looks like um gosh that’s weird looking it looks like do you know the uh like when people used to have like that device or that helmet thing or hat that people wear they had like the two beer cans on the side right it’s like that but the beer cans are turned horizontal when were the inspiration I mean you imagine every time you go feed your dog and try to get strapped onto this it’s just it’s just you know panting and just slobbering everywhere ludicrous No One’s Gonna use this the dedication you’d have to have I suppose perhaps show dogs those are extremely well trained oh how uncomfortable let’s say there’s a chin strap even yeah how embarrassing is the dog you know there it is yep you’ve got the cone machine was bad look at this thing this is in the realm of like the optigrab right yeah definitely this is um okay this might win some award I was back in 1980s so again that that is for a game this one however is how I woke up this morning this is how I on my bed I have the set of 100 chimes this would be so scary uh now this was a long way back 1882 so the standard four posts were bad um you’ve got the clock on the wall and some sort of apparatus were

look at the guy’s face I know he looks like he’s like about to be smothered he looks terrifying and you know what’s even it’s perfect because with an alarm like this there’s no way in hell you’re you’re gonna get married um he’s alone so that’s unfortunate I don’t know it is qualifies as some sort of birth control device I mean this would be have to be a last resort The Last Resort you know where you’re talking about you just can’t you know your alarm you’re not able to hear it yeah maybe it’s a hearing impaired so what is it so like it’s attached so for the uh the listeners out there it’s a it’s a picture of a man looking very disturbed laying in bed and above him attached to a wire cabling system attached to a clock are a bunch of Chimes and they look suspiciously close to his head well they do I mean just this is of course the figure one two three four five six seven eight nine ten by one two three four five so it’s only 60. it’s 60 individual Chimes and there must be a mechanism so let’s let’s see I’ll go and rotate back here whoa yeah so this is this is back in the day when people read upside down yeah yeah um Leonardo Leonardo da Vinci where you’re right in mirror right as a means of what waking persons from sleep the combination of the of the light frame okay the chord the device for retaining automatically releasing said cord so appears like okay it’s not necessarily like a very involved like there’s no combustion engine involved yeah it seems like it like it like drops the Chimes it’s just gonna drop the little cable about an inch and get them to make noise yeah so it’s it is mechanical um okay yeah okay yeah that’s weird thank you Samuel Applegate for that okay let’s move on we got four more to go we’re making good time okay fast forward in 1981 um you know this for for office workers administrative staff you know back then when envelopes were big you know in 80s even early 90s and some days I’m still doing a couple envelopes what’s the worst thing you have to do looking to stick them no you don’t because now it’s an automatic postage liquor yep that’s what you need yeah and no one knew about this see the shape of a lip and tongue we’re looking at podcasters is wow with with full lips and you see itemized 12 and 40 as the top lip uh looks like a female lip perhaps you could customize it and get a male get a mustache right there and that does the 25 of course looks like it’s the major functional piece but this is a brick this is a box looks like a Kleenex box and you push a button to uh bring out the moistened pad um you know I have seen just simple sponges but for heaven’s sakes when that’s not enough why not get something that looks like a tongue so this has got to be a novelty really um they couldn’t have but there is enough utility here and and what’s interesting about these we call it weird inventions to point out is that I I suspect that this inventor Donald pointer you know he is this is tongue-in-cheek no pun intended it’s it’s like a Spencer’s Gift it’s it’s going to be a novelty item something hilarious and that is enough entertainment is enough to to meet the utility requirement for for patentability and eligibility so um very cool of course it has to be mechanically and structurally however they’re claiming it unique novel non-obvious but no idea too dumb right I mean you know your own human tongue does this right but this is a this is because it’s funny that actually may have been what brought it over to be non-obvious yeah I mean uh it’s weird it is weird um okay this one we’ve got three more left um I don’t get too many of these but okay wearable device this was funny are you a bird lover um what do they call those warblers no warblers I’m not either what do they call the people that like to watch Birds um oh uh well I’m thinking of the Autobahn so the answer to question is no obviously yeah we don’t know now this one’s funny I I like eagles now if this works for Eagles I’d be freaked out because look at what we got here you just put it on your head okay if your goggles was closed for someone who wants to get really really intimate with girl um drop the binoculars you just gotta wear this this is incredible and it’s a yeah [Music] this podcast is okay what we’re looking at is an individual that can place it is an apparatus you put on your head it’s got two beams that extend outward that then hold the bird feeders on it and also you can actually have it going in three to you know two different directions okay yeah and all you got to do is just look to your left or look to the right to get all your looking that you need to see without you know well and yeah so um you know good listener at home um you’ve seen those like things people wear that looks like they have an arrow stuck through their head you know the arrow comes in one set comes out the other same idea but attached to it or some sort of like bird feeders or hummingbird feeders yeah yeah it’s uh it’s wild man it’s wild as well all right we’re closing on the end here of the weird patents um this one is cool I mean do you ride a bike I’ve been known to ride a bike um have you ever ridden a bike where you’ve got like you know your child behind you when those little safety seats no my parents used to have one of those I used to ride back oh it was just so good then it came that yeah this would have been wonderful I mean you were you were not a child in 2001. and I’m the no I’m a baby of the 80s baby days but look at this this is your dad look at the activity belt wow for the child Rider wow yeah okay I’m looking at what we’re seeing is basically a giant workout belt if you can imagine uh with horn whistle clicks um a flower dleo yep some other stuff yep to keep the child busy because otherwise you know looking at Mother Nature isn’t good enough no

yeah this is um I guess this would be for like if if you I think most useful I would say um for like us a stationary bike I don’t know man this is such a particular such a particular Solutions is such a particular problem Niche uh yeah totally Niche let’s do one more and then I want to show the patent success Matrix then we’ll jump to our bold bite last one today um you were out and about in Montana and I was did you think about snakes when you were out walking around hunting you know I I did not I did nothing but snakes you did have that running a close running with them with actual running with it without yeah yep we had the mountain lion calling us if you’re worried about snakes maybe if you’re in front of the higher desert um you could have just worn this this snake repellent system oh boy and it just simply straps around your leg and when it hears no I don’t actually don’t know I just want to look at this for a little bit yeah so what is this thing is it like does it give off a smell let’s look let’s take a peek it looks like you know like a hockey puck attacks or somebody’s leg with a strap yeah nauseous gas or noise coming from it oh so it’s a receptacle to which a quantity of garlic or onion oh this is for this is for vampire snakes is it okay I see I didn’t know yeah vampire snakes you know you got to be joking I don’t know apparently yes relying on the fact that snakes can smell I don’t know that and then two that garlic onion is what is going to repel them

oh my goodness the receptacle may be provided with a mincing rack to mince a clove of garlic thereby more fully released in its Aroma wow so my goodness that would stink so you know again inventions for a single uh person um someone who’s out in the wild someone who likes to cook with garlic you know and likes to cook outside all right I don’t know let’s get serious a little bit uh we’ve got two minutes of this I’m gonna share my screen on um the patent success Matrix this is something that we talk about here at bold with our clients um in all seriousness when they’re looking to go after a subject matter it’s gonna be a little bit small for you guys I’ll zoom in a bit so so we just looked at granted patents yep okay that the usbto examiners have said you know what yes this is worthy of getting a patent well all they’re talking about is this y-axis right going back to math class patentability up down you know what it’s good enough it’s it’s green enough to me it’s novel eligible novel and non-obvious and which is how we talked about has utility yep does it have marketability though right this x-axis for those we just looked at I highly suspect not are they is the market size big enough was there a big enough industry how many competitors they have is there really a true demand that’s really the biggest question um so a lot of those we saw were kind of novelty kind of you know so if it’s going to cost you know investment of 15 20 plus thousand dollars you want to make sure you’re going to get at least get a good Roi on your investment um so that’s what this this whole page is talking about so I want to provide the link to this there’s a whole discussion about each step here for you free listeners about novelty non-obviousness marketability what it means to do some research um and while us you know being lawyers and patent attorneys we help answer that patentability question it is on you the inventor to really explore marketability and to make sure hire professionals we do have others that we can make referrals to but that is the onus is on you to get that done

About the Author
J.D. Houvener is a Registered USPTO Patent Attorney who has a strong interest in helping entrepreneurs and businesses thrive. J.D. leverages his technical background in engineering and experience in the aerospace industry to provide businesses with a unique perspective on their patent needs. He works with clients who are serious about investing in their intellectual assets and provides counsel on how to capitalize their patents in the market. If you have any questions regarding this article or patents in general, consider contacting J.D. at